HOTEL BARCELONA Set to Launch on PlayStation This September

Sure, here it goes:

—

So, there’s this game, or maybe a wild nightmare, called HOTEL BARCELONA. Swery and Suda51, yeah those guys, are unleashing it on PlayStation 5 come September. CULT Games and White Owls are throwing this party. Excited? Maybe you should be. Or not. Who knows?

Okay, picture this: A hotel, somewhere sketchy between Pennsylvania and West Virginia, right? Its fancy looks are a huge lie because it’s like a playground for America’s top serial killers. Why did I picture this while eating cereal? No idea, but there it is.

Enter Justine. Who’s she? Just your average federal marshal with a little twist, carrying the chaotic mind of Dr. Carnival, a nutcase with a bloody past. Together, they gotta clean house—wipe out each psycho in this spooky hotel and hopefully get out alive. Or something like that.

Ah, and the features? Well, you’ve got this peculiar 2.5D action vibe. It’s not your vanilla side-scroller, no way. Think battles that are like dance-offs with your life on the line. It’s a carnival, really, drenched in the eerie glow of ‘80s horror flicks.

Oh, and if you perish (not literally), your past self kinda lingers around like a bad hangover. These “Slasher Phantoms” replay your mess-ups, maybe clip a few baddies, I dunno. Use them as pals or the world’s weirdest meat shields. Each screw-up just bulks you up more.

And there’s blood. So much blood. It’s not just for show. Smear it all over and you get stronger or something. There’s this meter, the Skull Gauge, fill it and BAM! You unleash something I’d rather not meet in a dark alley.

Then there’s these zones, seven in fact, each serving a different slice of horror pie. From mansions straight outta ghost stories to laboratories bubbling with who-knows-what. Oh, and bosses, let’s not forget those. Each one probably has a whole therapy session’s worth of issues.

Swery and Suda51 joined forces for this. What a duo! Their styles collide in this mashup filled with gore, thrills, and probably stuff that’ll haunt your dreams. Or make you chuckle awkwardly.

Oh look, pictures. Imagine some eerie, dark art vibe. Or maybe I’ve just lost track while staring at these images.

So yeah, HOTEL BARCELONA – whether it’s a game or just a fever dream in digital format, it’s coming soon. Are you in? Not sure if I am. But then again, chaos has its charm.